Trust

I run into mistrust regularly. It feels like a bad old friend- comes and goes when it pleases, but I still open the door to its invitations. Needless to say, it never feels warm and cozy but rather distant and neurotic. How do we build trust with our family, lovers, friends, and the world. What is trust? I have gotten to know that trust appears and grows when I feel safe and protected in the company of the person I am with. Like I feel it in my being that there is integrity and complete openness between us. There is unconditional love. That is the purest form of love. Mary Magdalene and Jesus loved each other unconditionally. That I have faith in. My heart yearns to be able to exhale and fall into trust. No more stories in the mind, just utter surrender to love. I work at it diligently. Every time she knocks on the door with her other partners in crime (resentment, anger, vengeance), I sit with her until she relaxes. I give her love and everything else she needs to alchemize. Is it just on me though? What if I give her all I have, and she still comes to visit, maybe I have to look into her red flags. What if she is there to help me see. See where I need to set a boundary, examine my own needs, or strengthen my own inner compass and invite honesty and alignment in a relationship. In these cases, mistrust comes as a gift. She isn’t meant to be a permanent home, but it can be a doorway — a teacher that guides you toward self-respect, deeper truth, and more nourishing connections.